Tag Archives: Baby

Is my baby a toddler?

is my baby a toddler

I’ve sort of gotten used to being a mom of a baby. I mean, as used to it as you can get – I’m tired a lot, and so much busier than I ever imagined, but I sort of have it figured out. But the rules are changing and I can feel it; Harley is growing up so fast, and as I watch her pull herself up to standing, I’ve been wondering… is my baby a toddler? Where do you draw that line?

From what I’ve read online, everyone has their own definition. Some people say that a baby becomes a toddler once they can walk. Others say it’s from when they are a year old. Others give you until the baby is 18 months. And while Harley will always be MY baby, I’m not too sure that she’s actually a baby anymore. I think she’s a toddler. Continue Reading

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Becoming a mom changed my view of my mom

mom

When people ask, I say that my mom and I have always been close. It’s funny, though, when she and my father were going through their awful, drawn out divorce, we had tearful conversations about how hadn’t felt close when I was growing up. But then we went back and read our diaries and found at the time, we actually had always felt close – both writing about going for coffee together, visiting museums, and all our funny jokes that just we shared. Obviously, we had the usual dramas and tears that adolescence brought; at one point I even shouted “you don’t know me and I don’t know you” during a fight, only to laugh about it a couple hours later.

As I’ve grown into adulthood, we’ve stayed close. At some points growing closer together and at others further apart. But we always spoke, we always shared pretty much everything, and we have always based everything on the foundation of loving each other no matter what. Even when we disagree, we can usually at least see where the other person is coming from. We get each other in a profound way, and our relationship has been such a solid part of my life. And having Harley made things even more meaningful for me. Continue Reading

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Thoughts on a 9-month old baby

Harley 9 months

I have been staring at a blank screen for 5 minutes now. I had all sorts of thoughts and ideas that I wanted to write about what it feels like to have a 9-month old baby. But I managed to get her to take a nap, and instead of working furiously as usual when she sleeps, I’ve just been enjoying the quiet for a bit. Which I suppose is the biggest change, the biggest shift in who I am and how I see the world. Nine months down the line, and it feels as if Harley has brought a new version of me into the world.

I keep thinking about one aspect of time, over and over again. Harley came eight weeks early. I didn’t get the full nine months of pregnancy, I didn’t get to go into labor; I had a very unique jump into motherhood. And yet, in my head, pregnancy still lasts nine months. In my head, this month-iversary is an important one because it would normally mark a point when Harley would have spent as much time outside my body as she did inside. Of course, we already hit that point a couple months ago, Still, this feels like a milestone celebration. Continue Reading

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When should you apologize for your baby crying

best kid

There’s a story that I’ve seen a few times on social media. It seems sorta cool at first. It shows a picture of a bag with candy and ear plugs and a cute note – parents apparently have started passing these out when they fly.  It’s meant to make the other passengers feel nicer towards the crying baby on the plane, mollified with sucking candy and earplugs and a note explaining that the baby can’t help it but doesn’t mean any harm and that people can come visit in seat such and such. It was a cool idea, I thought at first.

Then I saw an article against it, saying that babies will cry on planes, it’s just that simple. And to apologize for it is the same as apologizing for any other aspect of travel that everyone has to live with. Sure, it sucks to be next to a baby that cries for hours of your flight. But the reality is that most babies only really cry during takeoff and landing, and maybe a bit in the middle bits. The rest is normal baby stuff, normal life stuff about spending time in close proximity to other humans while you move around the world. It might be a cute idea, but it sets up a strange kind of expectation for parents to make other people okay with their baby’s crying. Why do we all apologize for it, and when should we? Continue Reading

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A morning out to see Disney Africa’s showcase

Disney

On Thursday, it was time for the annual Disney Africa showcase. This is one of my favorite events every year. Sure, there are amazing game launches throughout the year, and an overseas trip for work is amazing, but staying local and doing the local event scene, Disney Africa has this down to an art. The Venue in Melrose is ideal for it – big enough to accommodate everyone without feeling too crowded or too empty. Plus, there is great food and a cool brand showing their stuff. It was to be my first morning out without Harley for more than half an hour or an hour.

Leading up to it, I was so nervous. Harley has been super clingy lately – it’s about the right timing for her to have intense separation anxiety as she understands that we are separate people now and wants me to always be around her. We play lots of peekaboo, and I always tell her that even when I go away, I always come back. I’ve been doing everything I can to try and help her understand this, but I’m not too sure it’s actually working just yet. Continue Reading

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